the white room
that absence of cacophony
i haven’t been able to write much lately.
and when that happens, i usually have an idea why. my sinus passages are once again obstructed and, as a result, all of my thoughts feel jumbled and confused, tangled and unclear. hazy.
coherent words are just not possible. and therefore not intriguing or inspirational — to me or to anyone else. so i’ve been concentrating more on movement instead.
i’ve been practicing qi gong for about eleven years now. rooted in traditional chinese medicine, it’s a lovely example of both movement and meditation, leading to increased flexibility in both body and mind.
though i am a huge advocate of mindfulness, i’ve found meditation difficult in the past. i was often unable to calm my mind long enough to ever reap any real benefits. since introducing qi gong into my daily ritual, however, my attempts at meditation have been much more satisfying.
except for one thing. visualization.
i love words. i write words. i think in words. images just don’t come up when i try to picture something. words do. i am simply not a visual person (unless seeing words in my head counts).
but one day while living in italy — way back in early 2018 during a reflexology session with my dear friend ivana — a beautiful visual suddenly sprang to mind. in the middle of that self-care setting, the image was as vivid as a movie screen in front of me. it was of a very large white room, divided into two sections. there were windows, but no furniture at all. the room was spacious, expansive, and empty.
empty, except for one thought. one of my thoughts. just one, so i could easily pay attention to it.
and then the image was gone. but the feeling of spaciousness and clarity lingered.
i thought about it often over the days that followed, pondering its meaning. and i finally wrote my thoughts out in the form of a poem, in an attempt to forever capture the essence of the experience.
i happened to stumble across that poem yesterday, over eight years later. since i’ve been recently struggling to quiet my overly-anxious mind, its serenity arrived at a very opportune time.
and it occurred to me that someone else might be inwardly searching for that absence of cacophony as well. so i decided to share my poem here today . . .
let’s paint a picture, shall we?
of the quiet place we envision,
often long for in our minds.
a place with no cacophony of thoughts.
it’s white and it’s spacious.
and just one thought is in view.
allowed to linger for a time,
taking up exactly its required space.
no more, no less.
leaving ample breathing room.
to process and digest it.
to keep it or release it.
it’s simple in that white white room,
and tidy too.
a room without chaos,
a room filled with calm.
awareness floods the emptiness
with dazzling warmth and truth.
bright light and crystal clarity,
a glowing knowing from within.
if only we could keep creating,
each and every day,
this important mental haven,
mind and soul restored again.
