a different person. (part 2)

last week i wrote these words:

yes, i am reawakening parts of myself formerly dormant or untouched.
but i’ve also had to temporarily shut down a few parts i still need,
out of necessity during this complete upheaval.
the rest of the year will be dedicated to reviving those areas.
(one of which i will reveal in next week’s blog post . . .)

and this week:

I DROVE.

i didn’t drive far.
i didn’t drive long.

but i drove.
in italy.

okay, let me explain . . .

i was late to the driving scene.
i didn’t get my license until i was 19,
and then with no formal training.

after that i loved to drive.
especially in my beloved red mini cooper.
in seattle, fast and fun, listening to tunes.

until i got hit by a drunk driver.
on the freeway in northern idaho,
one rainy december night.

not the first accident i’d been in
(none of them my fault),
but by far the scariest.

i was driving a mercedes SUV.
and even though it was totaled,
its solidness saved me.

but the experience changed me.
i still drove, but only when i had to.
and i avoided the freeway if at all possible.

fast forward to my move to italy . . .

excuse #1: everything was scary, new, overwhelming.
“no need to pay for a second driver on the rental car.”
i’ll drive later.

excuse #2: curvy narrow roads, fast cars (land of ferrari).
“these italian ‘grand prix’ drivers won’t want to wait for me.”
i’ll drive later.

excuse #3: my u.s. driver’s license expired.
“too bad, just when we bought our own car.”
i’ll drive later.

excuse #4: renewed license, but a bit of car trouble.
“waiting for the part, we’re not going anywhere.”
i’ll drive later.

and then eric fixed the car.
and i ran out of excuses.
so what else could i do?

I DROVE.

i didn’t drive far.
i didn’t drive long.

but i drove.
in italy.

and it was okay.
in fact, it felt good.

because you see, as time went on,
it grew more frightening to try.

i was nervous, i felt timid.
i wasn’t even sure i’d remember what to do.

but i NEEDED to reawaken this aspect of myself.
and i did.

today i’m proud of myself.
today i know i can regain parts of me that feel lost.

i’m a different person, yes.
and each day i am able to shape who and what
i want to be in this world.

such power, resting right in my hands.
 
 
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do you feel lost in some way?
do you need to reawaken certain aspects of yourself?
because you have that immense power as well.

october 22 through 27!
more details coming soon . . .
 
 
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